Dowie Sticks Fingers Up At Jordan And Joins Number One Team In South London



Iain Dowie has joint Charlton in a move that has infuriated Simon Jordan, causing him to become, well, reamin a 'healthy' orange. Jordan stupidly released Dowie from his contract at Crystal Palace last week, believing that Dowie whished to move up north to be with his family.

And Dowie has moved a mammoth 6.8 miles north of Croydon to Se7 where he becomes the manager of Premiership team Charlton Athletic, replacing Alan Curbishley who managed the addicks for 15 years, in a move that showed remaining loyal to your management team can eunsure success. Incidentily, Palace had 13 managers in that time and currently find themseles struggling to get of the Championship playing to crowds of under 20,000 at a ground where Blue Peter badge holders get in free.

Jordan has issued Dowie with a writ in a shameless publicity stunt at the press conference where Dowie was being unveiled as the Charlton boss. This 'pantomime' display went like this:

Charlton chairman Richard Murray said he thought it must be the pantomime season when a middle-aged man waving a piece of paper burst into the press conference to unveil new manager Iain Dowie. Here's how the 'panto' unfolded:

Bailiff: "Mr Dowie. I have a writ to serve on you on behalf of Crystal Place Football Club..."
Murray: "This is a joke isn't it?"
Bailiff: "For fraudulent misrepresentation in the terms of leaving Crystal Palace..."
Murray: "You're joking..." [laughs]. Scuffling begins as a burly security guard blocks the path of the bailiff towards the podium where Dowie is seated.
Bailiff: "I will leave. I will leave..."
Journalist [to Murray]: "He probably had a writ for you as well."
Murray laughs. Security guard has a physical hold on the bailiff as he escorts him past, among others, chief executive Peter Varney and general manager Andrew Mills up the stairs to the door.
Murray: "We had a chat with Simon Jordan and he was all right with it."
[Then, almost inaudibly to Dowie]: "Did he say whose name it was in? Or was he just a plant?" [laughs].
Dowie [joking]: "I don't know, I've got five others waiting!"
Finally, the bailiff is escorted away and waits outside the Valley in a second attempt to serve the writ. He is later invited back and accomplishes his task.

Naturally, the calm, cool and collected Richard Murray wasn't phased.

"I didn't know what was going on - suddenly this guy came running in waving a piece of paper," said Richard. "It was amazing.

"Simon knows my number and he knows Iain's number - why can't he just pick up the phone?

"He does seem to do all his communication in bizarre ways, such as Sunday newspapers.

"If he's got a gripe with me let's just hope he's man enough to pick up the phone and talk to me.

"He does everything through the press. I think he's called me all sorts of names but I never respond, that's not my style. We just get on with winning games here at Charlton. If Simon wants to ring me about compensation he can.

"What he's got against Charlton Athletic I have no idea, apart from the fact his club got relegated at The Valley a couple of seasons ago."

The chairman added: "To my knowledge Iain had signed a compromise agreement - an agreement to waive the contract - but I don't think it had anything to do with moving house or his family.

"Iain's with us now and I'm going to back him to the hilt. I know he's got integrity and that's all that counts.

"Simon's probably just a bit bitter that he's lost a excellent manager."

Murray also confirmed that the new Charlton boss will be settling within close proximity to The Valley

So, after the events of the past few days, Dowie is the new Charlton manager, Jordan still has to Enjoy the Championship You Tosser, and once again his outspoken views have made him look quite the tit, although, the hair and the fake tan didn't help.